I see ads all across Florida promoting adoption. As a birthmother and a proponent of adoption this is encouraging to me, but it also fills me with worries for prospective birthmothers. I had two wonderful placements, but I knew the key to those experiences was the one on one attention I got from the small adoption firm of Hausmann & Hickman. I worry that birthmothers, in a desperate time in their lives, will end up with an agency that does not have her and her child’s best needs at heart. Adoption has changed so much over the last 20 years and it continues to change and evolve with each passing day. There are many options open to a birthmother in adoption and those options should be presented and made available to her Some of the agencies I encountered during my placements felt a bit…Stepford- I had no ability to form my own adoption plan. For example, some agencies would require that I live in a public housing unit with other birth moms or participate in group therapy. I was going through such a personal experience, and being such a private person, I did not want to be on display in a public living facility. I didn’t feel I was going to be an individual going through a difficult time in my life there, I felt like I was intruding on a collective. Each person in these experiences is uniquely individual, including the birth mother, the adoptive parents, and the child. The environment should be tailored to fit the needs of all of those people, especially the child. After all, adoption is always about the child. There are several points I want to discuss in this blog that are often brought when trying to choose a firm/agency to use. These are my experiences and my thoughts on the processes I went through.
It is important to do your research. Work only with a qualified Florida Adoption Professional who will give you allow you to choose the type of adoption placement that right for you and your baby.